Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Home again....

Weds. evening and my younger daughter got over her fever just in time for her older sister to get it.  She got up this morning and said she felt dizzy.  Here I was getting us all ready to go and I tell her to eat and she'll feel better.  Nice, huh?  Her school called my school at 8:20 and out the door I went.  I feel awful for my 1:1 student that really depends on me to get through his day, but my family comes first of course.  I was out 3 days last week.  I thought the secretary was going to have my head.  It's very hard to find a sub at the last minute.  That's mommyhood for ya!  I'm where I would want to be if my baby is sick.  (OK, she's 11, but she'll always be my first baby!)

It was sooo beautiful outside today.  I sat outside on my back porch and I soaked up the sun for a few.  SOOO nice to feel sun on my face.  Gives that renewed feeling.  I hope the girls are both healthy soon so we can enjoy it together.   G'night!

Monday, March 28, 2005

Just Another Manic Monday

WELL!  I haven't had the chance to write for awhile.  I've been taking the time to read other journals, browse, and chat....Boy, some of those chat rooms...but I have found a nice, personable room with a group of regulars that I like to chat with, so that's fun sometimes.

Mai was sick until SATURDAY!  Sunday was better for Easter, thank goodness, but I didn't dare bring her to church with Mandy and me.  She still had a cough and no one would want to be near her!  It's so hard to see them sick like that!  She stayed home with dad, who finally decided to get up and grace the livingroom couch with his presence.  This being after the girls had their baskets and egg hunt, that is...Well, that's another entry.

We had a delayed opening for school today - that was a surprise!  Freezing rain...Our whole playground was flooded big time.  A lot of our neighbors here at the condos had their basements flooded, but we lucked out on that one.  I can not believe there was another earthquake in Indonesea.  I have always been a firm believer in that everything happens for a reason, but some things I can't understand.  Like that, harm to children, poverty, you know.....I guess there are some things we just are not meant to understand.

Well, I haven't much to say today, just thought I would add my thoughts...a lot going on in the news, Terri, Michael(doesn't even deserve to have his name in my journal), all the bad stuff...Our good news - Mai is finally feeling herself, Mandy is a happy preteen (half the time, which I think is a good fraction) and I have a new work schedule that is keeping me on my toes.  I like the uneventful... Soon both girls will be doing spring sports (adding to their already crazy life!) and that will hopefully be the extent of my news.

Hope all had a nice Easter/weekend!! 

Wednesday, March 23, 2005


Well, this has been a short work week for me.  I've been home for 2 days with Mai.  She's got a temp and aches in her head and stomach.  She may be ready to go back to school tomorrow - although this morning she still had 101.6 fever.  She is up and around, playing games and eating well, so...I guess we'll wait and see.  I do love being home though, as much as I love my job at school.  I was home with both my girls until they were toddlers.  Financially, it was hard, but the benefits outweigh the negatives.  I miss being home sometimes- I love homemaking- but I really wouldn't want to stop doing what I am doing.  I love the rewards of working with challenged students and seeing them overcome those challenges to learn to read, write, etc.  I also have the LUXURY of having summers off and the same schedule as my kids throughout their school year.  They are also sooo supportive of family issues like illnesses and personal issues.  Also, if I am stressed out- maybe a student is noncompliant all day or I feel like I can't do anything right that day, I have a great support system in my coworkers. 

Well, this is short...My sweetie is hungry for lunch - a good sign!  Later!

Monday, March 21, 2005

A poem

Your eyes

Are a little darker

Each time I see you.

It has been

Over a year

Just over a year...

I want to cry

Out to you

Hold your pain for you

I can't

I only smile

When I see you...smiling


To hide your pain

From anyone who might ask

How you are doing....

Saturday, March 19, 2005

just an entry

It's a quiet night here.  The girls and I went to a dinner at church to raise money for the camper fund, then we went clothes shopping for Easter.  They are growing out of their clothes really fast.  Is it possible that they are already 11 and 8 (almost)?  I want to slow down the clock! 

I am so saddened about little Jessica in Florida, as many of you are from what I've been reading.  Crimes against children are the worst and I pray everyday for God to watch over these victims (including the one closest to me) and thank Him for keeping us safe from harm.  We have had our share of tragedy, but somehow we manage to pull through and I am so very, very thankful.  May you rest peacefully, Jessica.

It was so nice out today.  Spring is truly around the corner, and I am sooo ready.  We all have a bad case of cabin fever.  I'm not doing very well with the March into May fitness challenge.  I only went to aqua fitness once this week.  There's so much happening.  I always use this excuse, when really all I'd have to do is climb up and down our 2 flights of stairs for 10 - 15 minutes or go for a walk.  And if I could get my snacking under control... I really need to do something different.  I know when I start feeling the "in a rut" feeling that I need to change something.  Maybe when the weather stays nice for more than 2 days at a time!  I love waking up and the sun is just beaming through the windows.  It's a bit easier to get up for work when it's not pitch dark out.


Sunday, March 13, 2005

counting my blessings

You know, it's amazing how one moment I was feeling sorry for myself and hating the snow and then wham!  I stepped outside late last night after chatting for like an hour and the trees were so piled high with heavy snow.  It was the most beautiful snowfall we've had this year.  I felt so peaceful just looking at it! 

It's amazing how one moment can just change your whole mood. 

So, the girls and I got up and went to church, said our prayers, our thank yous and smiled with our friends and I feel so much better today.  We came home and made a HUGE snowman and then Jack took them out back and made a really cool fort.   Then the girls took turns going with Dad to the store and this evening we went out to dinner at a chinese buffet.  It was really nice having him home.  He will be off until Thursday, so it will be good for all of us.  The girls really miss him.  I think that is the hardest thing for me is seeing them sad that he's not around.  I feel like it's my fault that they never see him until rare moments like this when he has time off.  He won't be off again until the middle of next month.  So, I guess when I feel like we have nothing to say it's because I feel so disconnected to him sometimes.  And then there is the language barrier, which isn't really that big, but at times it feels like it is when I have to explain the simplest thing.  Well, it's been 12 years so I think I should be used to it!  I am lucky to have such a dependable and hard working husband.

Back to work tomorrow.  I hope that it's nice and sunny again like it was today so that we can all get outside at recess time!  I hope they never do away with recess.  We all need it!!                                

Saturday, March 12, 2005

Another Saturday night....

Wow.  This is a really big storm...Is spring anywhere in sight?  I think not. Im feeling lonely tonight.  Kids are in bed. "Jack" is not home yet.  When he is home we don't talk a lot anyway.  I'm not sure why.  Could it be we've actually run out of things to say?  Now I feel like im getting to personal.

Ok.  Lighten up now.  I will probably get to bed soon anyway.  Have to get up early tomorrow.  Not too early, but I've been tired the last couple days.  I hope Im not coming down with something!  I took the girls out earlier this evening to play while I shoveled the neverending snow.  It felt good to get out and get some fresh air.  I'll be glad when it's fresh spring air though!!  That's probably half my problem lately.  Cabin fever!

Not much going on this weekend.  Little league tryouts were today.  That's about the only excitement.  What's fun for them is fun for me.  Except watching Napoleon Dynamite.  My oldest insisted we get this on MOD.  What a pointless, annoying movie.  I actually fell asleep.

Well, goodnight all.  I bored myself to sleep!!!  I will browse around for a while til Jack comes home.  I think it annoys him to see me on the pc every night.  Hey, if he was home I might not be!! I need something to do that  isn't kid based!!

Thursday, March 10, 2005

Time? What time?

Well....Here I thought I was actually going to have time to write in a journal!  Ha!  I tried writing about 30 minutes ago and got, oh, about this far.  My youngest really still needs me at bedtime.  I still enjoy it.  I dry her (extremely) long hair and then we read.  We are trying pretty successfully to get past the "lay down with me stage".  She has tons of stuffed animals around her.  The largest ones represent me...thank you.  My older daughter is independant now for the most part.  She is still trying to finish her homework.  She had a band concert tonight as well as guitar lessons after school so it's been a busy day.

We are starting the March into May next week.  I'm supposed to start my exercise schedule then.  I think I can go to the aqua fitness class Monday and Wedsnesday.  My husband "Jack" will actually have a few days off.  He's putting 4 days together in a row  instead of the usual 2 every 2 weeks.  (It changes all the time, I can't keep up.) I am hoping I will be able to stick with it.  Even if I can't make it to the gym, I will force myself to do some at home aerobics.  I'm hoping my energy level goes up since the Dr. has upped my thyroid meds.  I've gone from 25 mg. to 200 mg. in less than a years time.  I just can't seem to get it down.  If any of you have weight/fatigue issues, I would suggest getting this checked.  My thyroid level was a 44 and it's supposed to be under 5!  It has gone down but not enough so they have to keep changing my dosage.  It really helps with the fatigue.  I have lost some weight since starting it, too.  But I seem to be stuck where I'm at. 

Well,  I guess that's it for now.  I have some other things to do here.  Large load of laundry to fold.  TGTF!


Saturday, March 5, 2005

saturday night fever

Okay....I am slowly learning how to do this.  I've been trying to figure out how to add pictures.  You would think that following directions would be easy for someone who gives them all day!  Well, it's the weekend and my mind is on a long lunch break.  If by chance this works, this picture is of my two lovey cats Fluffy and Tiger.  This was a rare moment because they actually fight all the time!  I also have 2 fish and a hamster.  Well, my girls do.  We can't have a dog in our condo so our love for animals is obviously overflowing!

Today was a busy one.  My youngest daughter age 7 had karate this morning then I took both girls (my oldest is 11) and one of their friends to see The Pacifier.  After that was a play date, then dinner, baths, aol, tv...not a very active day I'm afraid.  Tomorrow after church we are driving to visit a far away friend and go to Chuck e cheese's.  Maybe I'll climb through the tunnels to get some exercise!

Well, there's not much else to say tonight.  Still have laundry to fold (it's never ending!) so I guess I will sign off for now.  I have enjoyed meeting a few of you and feel that this will be a lot of fun as well as theraputic for me.  Thanks for all your help and input!

Friday, March 4, 2005

The beginning....

Well,  I guess it's time to get started.  My kids are finally letting ME online!  This is all new to me.  It's a little weird writing down a journal that any stranger can see.  I'm usually more hesitant than this when it comes to doing things like this, but I'm hoping I will meet some cool people.  I read a couple journal entries from others and thought this might be fun.  Ok., a little about me I suppose is in order!

I'm 35, married to a great man who works crappy hours which makes me lonely.  He's a cook and well, you know those restaurant hours...My girls are 7 and 11 and they are my life.  Everything I do is for them.  Which is probably why I need this. 

I work at school (K-3) as a Special Education Paraprofessional.  I love my job, the kids I work with, the rewards as well as the challenges....I love the hours that allow me to be with my own children.  Sometimes It's hard to come home, tho and have the same amount of patience that I have to have in my job!!  My past jobs include waitress, live in nanny, and singing in a band. 

I guess I don't haveto make this a tell all...I feel like I have to let people know me at least on a basic level and when I get used to this it won't sound so lame.  Please bare with me.  I may write more later after kids go to bed.  They are watching Disney channel right now.  Hubby won't get home til about 11:00.  I read a couple of inspiring journal entries about weight loss.  Maybe I will give this some thought.  I would like to get healthy!!!  I'm about 50 lbs overweight and feeling it. Errr.  BFN!